Study Reveals An Increase In Stress Levels in Students

CAMBRIDGE — A report published in Scientific American has shown that there has been a spike in stress levels in students all around the world. One of the major contributors to this stress? University acceptances. “I don’t understand it,” one of the lead researchers commented, waving a brochure from Harvard. “The entry requirements are lower … Continue reading Study Reveals An Increase In Stress Levels in Students

School District to Combat Grade Inflation with Student Cremation

KENMORE —The Northshore School District announced yesterday its proposal to combat its rapidly growing grade inflation epidemic. The district plans to roll out a new program in which students are selected, based on their GPA, attendance, followers on Instagram, and classroom participation, to be used as fuel for their school’s furnaces. Grade inflation has been … Continue reading School District to Combat Grade Inflation with Student Cremation

California Legislature Passes Bill to Make 2+2 Equal 5

April 12, 2019 SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA — The California state Senate approved a bill to permanently alter the value of 2 + 2 to five (5) within the state of California. The bill, motivated by activists claiming “all numbers are created equal”, was introduced to the State Assembly on Monday as an educational reform. After passing … Continue reading California Legislature Passes Bill to Make 2+2 Equal 5